For the last few months, my fatigue levels have increased. So has my irritability & grumpiness. I haven't been sleeping well. A few weeks ago, I went in to see my doctor for a sinus infection & mentioned my fatigue. After talking for a few minutes, he told me he wanted me to do a sleep study.
I had my sleep study which I detailed here. 2 days after my study, I got my c-pap. I haven't noticed any big differences yet, but they said it might take awhile. We went in yesterday for an appointment with my sleep doctor. During my sleep study, I was having apneas 23 times per hour during my light sleep & 76 times per hour during my REM sleep. When they put me on the c-pap, my obstructive apneas decreased, but my central apneas (when brain signal that tells me to breath is delayed) increased. So now they have to find the right pressure & settings to balance that.
My sleep doctor also put me on Cymbalta to help with my fibromyalgia pain & some depression I'm fighting due to the pain, fatigue & starting "The Change". I'm really praying it will help as I'm tired of being near tears & being irritable with everyone especially my Hubby & kids. It's so hard to admit you are fighting depression.
Here goes: I'm fighting depression! I don't want to be around people,yet once I am, I'm glad. I want to sleep. I'm short tempered with my kids. I cry over everything. I fight with my Hubby over stupid things. BUT the key is that I am Fighting!! I'm not going to let this win. I spoke up & told my doctor (with prompting from Hubby). I got medication. Sometimes you need medication. I do.
Admitting your depressed is hard. It seems doubly hard if you are a Christian. As Christians we are supposed to have Joy, not be depressed. But, this is a fallen world & our bodies are imperfect. Sometimes depression is a result of sin & laziness in our lives. BUT sometimes it is a result of broken bodies, messed up brain chemicals or excess pain & stress. I'm so thankful that God has gifted some people with medical skills to treat depression.
So, that's my story for now. I'm getting help & I'm going to get through this. I know God will carry me through. And if you'd pray for me, I'd appreciate it more than you'll ever know.
You are not alone Lea. I too have fought depression off and on for years. I agree that sometimes medication is definitely necessary. Although my times of depression have lessened over the years they do still attack me when I seem to be at my weakest.
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