I'm gonna be alright!

I've been struggling a lot! Anytime you don't know what is wrong with your body, you struggle. It's always a roller-coaster of emotions.

I went to my regular doctor who confessed to me that he has no idea what is going on with me. He said we will wait to see what the MRI shows & then go from there. It was refreshing to have my doctor admit I have him stumped.

Last week, one of our elders at church preached about giving thanks & praise to God! This week, one of our missionaries, Dave Weston, preached on prayer! We need to become prayer warriors! We need to become impudent people who are so impassioned for Christ that we become people of prayer! Through these 2 sermons, God has laid it on my heart that I need to use this "down" time more effectively. I need to pray more for all those around me.

I was also blessed today after church by 3 wonderful, lovely ladies who came over to me & prayed over me! I didn't feel any different physically, but wow! My mood was lifted & a feeling of peace washed over me! I felt God whispering to me "You're gonna be alright!" I knew at that moment that no matter what the diagnosis, I would be alright! None of this is a surprise to God. My prayer is that whatever the diagnosis, whatever I have to go through, whatever obstacles I have to face, God will carry me through & He will be glorified through me! I pray it will be obvious that I could not get through this current health challenge without God's strength & God's Grace!

 

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The difference support makes!

After church today, I was thinking back 15 years to when I was waiting for another diagnosis. My situation was different in many ways then. We were still childless & I was off work on disability. We also were NOT plugged into a local church. And this was before twitter & Facebook. I had my Hubby & our families, but that was the extent of my support.

Today, waiting for diagnosis is still hard, but I am surrounded with love & support from many sources.

1. I have the most incredible husband! He loves me so much. He's so patient with me when I fall apart. He has picked up so much of the responsibilities here at home when he is home. He sees the tears & hears the fears I'm afraid to voice with anyone else. He is my rock!

2. I have awesome parents & in-laws who are helping with the kids & with whatever we need help with.

3. I have a great church family. I didn't have this 15 yrs ago. I'm overwhelmed by the offers of help. I've had offers for meals, childcare & housework. Now to figure out what help I need & when. I also know we are being covered with their prayers.

4. I have a ton of friends online supporting me. Childhood friends, college friends, family, church family & Internet friends. When I'm struggling, I can make a quick post. Then I'm covered in prayers & receive tons of encouragement.

This 2nd time of new symptoms & diagnosis waiting is still difficult, but the additional support I have is making an incredible difference. I'm having moments of fears & tears, but nothing like the crushing fear & depression I had from fighting this fight with very little support. Don't get me wrong, my Hubby & our families were awesome support back then, but there was only so much they could do.

I think twitter & Facebook have helped too. Being able to post how I'm doing is helping me be open, honest with others. It's hard to admit face to face that you are scared & struggling. But posting online is a little easier for me to share. And I know someone will reply with just the thing I need to hear.

If you are going through something similar, I suggest surrounding yourself with a strong support system! The bigger support team, the better off you will be.

To all of my friends & family, thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for offering to help us! Thank you for your prayers! Thank you for your words of support & encouragement! Thank you for being there! Also thank you to those of you who are supporting my Hubby & the kids. I know health issues affect more than just me, so thank you. I'm so greatful for all of you! Your love and support makes all the difference in the world!!!